Reject Bitterness & Receive Strength

This morning I was reading the account of David (before he was made king) when the Amalekites had destroyed Ziklag by fire, and taken all of David’s people captive – including his two wives. You can read about it in 1 Samuel 30. Verse 4 says “David and his men wept aloud until they they had no strength left to weep (NIV)” – as you would! This was a terrible blow.

But the verse that really jumped out at me was verse 6, which reads “David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the Lord his God (NIV)”

David fascinates me. He made many mistakes in his life – some of them catastrophic – and his morals were often questionable. But God’s Word refers to him as “a man after God’s heart” (1 Sam 13:14 & Acts 13:22) – so whenever I read clues as to what made David so different to other men, I sit up and take note. After all, don’t we all want to be men or women after God’s heart?

And this morning’s reading gave me one such big clue. All of the people concerned, both David and his men, had experienced a traumatic loss. Their homes were destroyed and their families kidnapped while they had been away. It is not difficult to imagine how they must have felt: guilt for not having been there; fear for what would happen to their loved ones; anger at whoever was responsible, and overwhelming grief at their loss. But in the midst of their all-consuming pain, only David showed the heart of a leader – the heart of God. Each of his men became bitter in spirit. But only David turned to God for strength.

This inspires me. We all face loss, pain and trouble in life. Jesus Himself promised it in John 16:33 when He said “in this world you will have trouble“. But when it comes, how do we respond? Do we allow the pain and loss to drive us to self-pity and bitterness, or do we allow it to drive us to God? Bitterness is a false friend. It may feel like a comforting blanket that we wrap round ourself to separate us from the horror of what has happened, but it actually turns into a wall between us and our true friends – like David’s men, who went from intense loyalty to wanting to stone him! Once we let bitterness take root in our lives it spreads to others and ruins everything. Hebrews 12: 15 says “And make sure no one lives with a root of bitterness sprouting within them which will only cause trouble and poison the hearts of many” (TPT)

So bitterness is not a true friend, but God is. He truly cares about our suffering – His compassions never fail (Lam 3:22) and every tear we shed is precious to Him (Ps 56:8). And it is not just powerless sympathy – He is the rock that holds firm when all around is is shaken. Just like David’s men were tempted in their bitterness to blame their leader and even stone him despite him being as much a victim as they were, the enemy loves to try to turn us against God and blame Him for our problems, immersing ourselves in bitterness instead of His great love and compassion. But people after God’s heart, like David, open their hearts to the only One Who can heal, strengthen, and give them the strength to fight back when all natural strength is gone.

Time after time we see David do this in the Psalms. For example,
“My enemies have trampled upon me all day long,
For they are many who fight proudly against me.
When I am afraid,
I will put my trust and faith in You.
In God, whose word I praise;
In God I have put my trust;
I shall not fear.
What can mere man do to me? ” (Ps 56:2-4, AMP)

If we want to be people after God’s heart – or even if that is not our priority but we just want to be free from the destructive trap that bitterness is – let us turn TO Him in times of trouble. We may have every reason to feel sorry for ourselves, and the truth is, it can be incredibly hard not to give in to self-pity, resentment & bitterness when facing suffering. But if we keep our hearts open to our Saviour by confessing how hard we are finding it and repenting of any negative attitude, He can save us, set us free, and give us impossible strength to not only fight, but overcome.

In the very next verse after David found strength in God, we see him asking God if he should pursue the raiders (v7). This is the man who had no strength left to even weep in verse 4! God answered David with encouragement to pursue his enemy, and eventually we see that David fought them from dusk until the next evening (that is supernatural strength!), and recovered everything (that is supernatural victory!)

“David fought them from dusk until the evening of the next day, and none of them got away, except four hundred young men who rode off on camels and fled. David recovered everything the Amalekites had taken, including his two wives.” 1 Sam 30:17-18.

So let this encourage us today – we may be facing difficulties and genuine suffering. But let us remember that while self-pity and bitterness may seem appealing for the moment, God is the only One Who can comfort, heal and lead us to freedom from whatever is hurting us. Let us turn to Him with open hearts, place our trust in Him like David did, and receive His strength and victory.